let me say that i was not one of those little girls who started planning this thing when she was five. in fact, pre-engagement, all i wanted was for someone to tell me when and where to show up -- with the idea being that there would be a party all day and all night, and somewhere along the way, we'd exchange some rings and say some stuff.
polotek and i are obviously very serious people. see exhibit A below.
see? so cereal.
ha, but really. while i'd like to think that i haven't strayed too far from my free-loving idea, something did indeed happen when polotek put this two-carat beauty on my left hand. some kind of bridal magic spell came over me and convinced me that i must make this an affair to remember.
all kidding aside, i do consider this an important event for our families and friends. and i'm not going to get all "fight the power" on this blog, but i will say that it makes us proud to know that we are defying the odds and statistics that overwhelmingly show the stable black relationship as some elusive thing. like a double rainbow. or michelle bachmann's common sense.
offbeat. unique. cool. fun. all words i want people to use when they are raving to their peeps about the awesome time they had at our wedding. hellmuthafreakinyeah.
that's literally what i said, by the way. when polotek asked me to marry him. except it was the actual expletive. obviously.
preliminary decisions are the hard part. at least that's what they tell me. i sure as hell hope it gets easier after this. there's a lot of moving parts right now -- budget, venue, invite list. stress? check.
the numbers estimate is floating somewhere between 120-200. that is a large gap. we have to work that out. but part of that depends on what venue we land, which feels like we are playing a game of craps. we've decided to have the wedding in the dc area (even though we recently moved across this big country to san francisco) so we can have as many of our special people attend as possible. but scoring a low-cost venue in the dc metro area is no small feat. so i am learning.
honestly, i don't know what i'd do without schniz to pull more and more options out of her hat. its only been a few weeks, and she has already sent countless emails to places, and pulled me back from the brink of craycray at least twice. she is a wedding goddess. working tirelessly for us to find a venue that we love for less than $2,500.
does that sound like a lot of money to you? because it initially did to me. i'm learning a lot during this process, and let me impart the first lesson: weddings are not cheap. putting numbers on paper for a wedding will hurt your soul. unless you are rich. then the possibilities are endless! however, we are not rich. we are forking up $15K from our pockets to bring this lovely (and not so) little affair to fruition. there have been weddings pulled off with less, and definitely with more. but in the realm of wedding planning, we're looking at smallish peas, people.
and we are doing this the debt-free way, so that means budget, budget budget! lucky for me, i am marrying a money management master.
but still -- this wedding ish ain't cheap.