how low can you go...?

apparently, not low enough.

by the way, sorry it took this girl so long to post -- last week was a busy week. and this one looks like more of the same. i'll try to not leave y'all hangin', though.

now i'd like to shout out to my fellow non-kardashians who can't throw ten-million-dollar weddings. what the crap, man?! i was especially irritated to hear about this last week because i spent that day working through catering estimates, all of which are BEYOND the $5,000 number we had hoped for...

oh, frustration!!! i mean, one way to look at it is that we were able to cut out about $3,000 from some estimates -- thanks to some great cost-saving ideas suggested by schniz -- but really, we are looking at roughly $8,000 for our total catering line. and with our budget already being as low as it is for many of the other line items, we know that this wedding is not happening for $15K. it could be more like $20K.

oy.

here's some rough info about the breakdown of our leading estimate, for those of you wondering how it could possibly cost this much:
 - we are budgeting for 150 guests (our original budget number was based on 120 or less)
 - there are a number of incidentals that really add up, and makes up approximately $3K of the $8K total
 - the food and beverage price per person is actually $35 -- this really is a low number because that includes a dinner buffet (all you can eat!), four hours of beer and wine open bar (all you can drink!), and cocktail hour nosh and after-dinner coffee bar
 - some of the incidentals really are things we must have -- table cloths, dinnerware, and servers for 150 people
- the caterer is also responsible for the set up and breakdown of the ceremony in addition to the reception parts

we are still waiting for some revisions to other estimates that could come in a little bit lower, but at best my guess is that the number will still be in the range of $8,000.

to be honest, the more i look at the number, the less frustrated i am by it, because i know that this arguably the most important line item of the event. and we are working with great companies, so we are sure to get great quality and service for our money.

also, being able to rest assured that the caterer will take care of things is not something you can give a price value. unless it's eight thousand dollars.

in other news, the save-the-dates have started to go out! we are sending them in waves, but as soon as they are all en route to their destinations, i'll be sure to post the goods here.

oh, and i have a meeting with ananda from bliss fotography tomorrow! that means engagement shoot photos will be coming soon!!! yayayayaya!

the dreaded invitation list.

with this post, i do believe i have surpassed the number of all posts i have ever posted on my previous blogs....combined. ha! so let this be a testament to my tireless devotion to bringing my peeps one hell of a party next fall. "hold on to your butts!" {i love saying that. can you name that movie??}

ok, my sentiments about the invitation list = shoot me. right now. please? yeah.

i am told that this is hands down THE HARDEST THING a couple has to do for their wedding.

we don't want to exclude anyone, but there is a finite number of invitations we can afford to send for a number of reasons.

when we break it down to the cost per person for food and bevies at the reception, it's easy to say we will have X number of people. but then when looking back at the list at names and thinking about how great it would be to have so-and-so come, or how happy this or that person would be to get an invite, it's not so easy. maybe we'll just go to costco and buy a crap ton of hot pockets and capri sun.

luckily the space issue is now resolved by booking st. francis hall, but finding a venue that can fit 100+ people for a ceremony and reception in the dc area for less than $2500 was crazy frustrating.

{with no particular persons in mind} what do you do about a relative whom you haven't seen or spoken with since you were 10, but is within a close circle of your family? or what about the friend whom you used to be ace-boon-coons with, and you may have even talked extensively with about going to each others weddings one day, but life happened, and you haven't really been in touch for a while? what about friends who aren't BFFs but might feel excluded if you invite everyone else in the circle? or what about really new, fun and fresh friends who you just met and feel close with, but can't confirm what your relationship will be in a year? the questions go on.... see? this part is not always fun.

i also want to be sensitive to the bride-groom invite ratio. where polotek is much more selective about his circle of friends, i feel that i have so many that would love to be apart of our special day. so the ratio currently stands at 2:1, but i don't want to dominate the event with all of my people! what to do?

right now the number is fluctuating between 150-200 people, and that is a very large group of people. huge, in fact.

a few people have mentioned that i should consider implementing "the single rule", where my friends that are not married, engaged, or in a serious long-term relationship should be asked to come alone. a few other people have told me they are less crazy about the idea. at this point, i have no clue what is the best thing to do.

because of these overwhelming factors, and my huge desire to make sure everyone is happy, i thank the heavens for schniz. my wedding goddess. we can rest assured that in the end, things will come together with her on our side.

i know, somewhat unrelated to this post, but so cute!

so yeah, it's a balancing act. some of you may be thinking that we should not worry about any of this, and that we should just let the cards fall where they will. but to me, it's not that easy. polotek and i are all about "the more, the merrier" and we want to be as inclusive as possible. we are having this wedding for all our friends and family because it IS a momentous occasion in our lives and the lives of our loved ones. so i say, go big or go home! that is, within the reasonable confines of our budget, of course. ;)

please feel free to share your thoughts and/or invitation list woes.